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| THE YEAR'S BEST (actual) HEADLINES OF 2005: |
ladybugca |
11/09/06 |
Crack Found on G overnor's Daughter [hmm!] Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says [No, really?] Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers [Now that's taking things a bit far!] Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus? [ ! do they ever read what they write?] Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over [What a guy!]
Miners Refuse to Work after Death [No-good-for- nothing' lazy so-and-sos!] Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant [See if that works any better than a fair trial!] War Dims Hope for Peace [I can see where it might have that effect!] If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile [You think?!] Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures [Who would have thought!] Enfield ( London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide [They may be on to something!] Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges [You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?!] Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge [He probably IS the battery charge] New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test G roup [Weren't they fat enough?!] Astronaut Takes Blame for G as in Spacecraft [That's what he gets for eating those beans!] Kids Make Nutritious Snacks [Taste just like chicken?] Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half [Chainsaw Massacre all over again!] Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors [Boy, are they tall!]
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