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| Now I have an alternative theory |
paraclete |
09/07/06 |
It's multinationals trying to kill us off and steal our land, what's your theory on the crisis?
Everything makes you fat - except food
By David Southwell
Thursday, September 07, 2006 at 12:32pm
Everything makes you fat.
This would seem the inevitable conclusion coming out of the international conference on obesity being held in Sydney this week.
McMansions make you fat. Not fidgeting makes you fat.
Cheap food makes the world fat, excepting those who are starving, of course.
Bad playgrounds make kids fat along with TV ads.
And finally scientific confirmation of what many of us have always insisted big bones make you fat (or in my case just big boned).
Weight gain, it appears, is an extremely complex carbohydrate business with no end of mitigating factors.
I also have long cherished theories about what makes me and possibly you fat. It could be aliens aiming a big fat ray at the earth to make us too roly-poly to resist invasion. Alternatively physicists are bound to soon discover free floating fat molecules in the air that bond themselves to unsuspecting humans, such as myself, probably as a result of global warming or something.
I also blame gyms for having too many mirrors, joggers for associating weight loss with 70s headbands and fridges for being too easy to open.
However for a moment let’s humour that lunatic fringe who insist that weight gain essentially and simply comes from eating too much fattening food and exercising too little.
No one to blame but ourselves? That’s not so easy to stomach. |
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